Burger Monkey is returning....

My mission to eat my way around London's burgers was interrupted by a move across the pond. This has offered me vastly more oppotunities to eat a decent burger at a good price, but a lot less time to write about them. However, now a year has gone by I have decided to bring the blog back to life. Washington DC is not a big city, but it punches above its weight in the food stakes.

Please follow me @burger_monkey - once I get to 100 followers my next review goes up, and it's the place POTUS himself goes, Ray's Hell Burger in Arlington, VA.  

#14: Hawksmoor Review

Hawksmoor: never knowingly undercheesedIs it possible to have too much of a good thing? I think it is, and for those who need convincing the burger at Hawksmoor offers a good case study. There has undoubtedly been a lot of thought, effort and love put into this burger. As one example of this attention to detail the burger mixture contains bone marrow in a nod to the restaurant's focus on tradition British butchery. The burger looks fab as the picture amply demonstrates. Even the cheeses are chosen from Neals Yards finest. I opted for the Ogleshield cheese (a rich, washed rind cheese made in Somerset which traces it lineage to Montgomery's cheddar) finding Stilton too rich and overpowering on burgers.

The eating didn't quite match that promise. I was two bloody marys down and starving when it arrived so I tore into it. But by two thirds in I was really struggling. Mrs BM would usually say that because I eat quickly (or more accurately like a pig), barely drawing breath between mouthfuls,it was hardly a suprise and my own bloody fault. But in this case she struggled too, finding that the enormous blob of cheese on top was beating the rest of the burger into submission. And I guess this typifies the main problem with the Hawksmoor burger: it is somehow less than the sum of its parts. Full of passion but too rich and somehow lacking in discipline and harmony. By the end the burger was also physically a bit of a mess, failing to retain its structural integrity. Rather like the England team that played USA that evening. As we walked from Spitalfields back to our flat on that warm Saturday afternoon, a distance of over four miles, I still felt unpleasantly full.

I shall return to this restaurant, with it's friendly and unfussy service and great meat. But I probably won't have the burger unless it is cut in half and I can share it with someone else who has got a steak.   

Hawksmoor, 157 Commercial Street, London E1 6BJ T: 0207 247 7392

#13: Hix Review

Hix: Turning baby cows into burgers since 2009

There was an upscale sushi restaurant on the site of what is now Hix, which opened replete with outrageous prices right at the nadir of recession. It didn’t last long, I know – it’s pretty much next to my office.  Hix, retaining much of the fit-out of its doomed predecessor, does a brisk trade flogging modern British food, including fish fingers and chips at 15 quid. It joins Bob Bob Ricard and Polpo as part of the really very decent restaurant quarter that is within a stone’s throw of Golden Square. I ate here half-cut on a warm Sunday afternoon in a pleasantly quiet dining room. I looked at the menu searching for a burger. There was one, except it wasn’t called a burger, had a cryptic name and was made of veal. I imagined a poor calf mooing. And then ordered it, all the while wondering whether veal counts and whether it would have the fullness of flavour or fattiness necessary to make a good burger.

I can attest that the Hix burger did indeed have a surprisingly beefy quality but without the overwrought, heaviness of say that at the Hawksmoor (of which more in a later posting). The colour was much deeper than expected, and cooked medium rare didn’t look too different to beef. Frankly I demolished it in short order.  It was a pleasure to eat – substantial but with structural integrity. The bun was perhaps slightly over toasted, but the burger had a pleasing charred note and the cheddar cheese providing the requisite fattiness without overpowering the burger. The accompanying fries, which cost nearly as much a Big Mac meal, were clean, crisp and hot and rounded out a solid and unique package. The burger and fries on its own will leave you almost no change from a score, and that’s before service (which incidentally was good). Baby cows don’t come cheap.

Hix, 66-70, Brewer Street, London, W1F 9UP, T: 020 7292 3518

#12: Goodman Review

Good, man

We visited Goodman on Good Friday offering ample opportunity for lame punning. In our party there were three ex-pat Americans, including Sarah who is a Chicagoan and therefore knows what makes a good steakhouse. In short, a tough crowd with high expectations.  

Goodman seems to have all the elements in place: top quality cow, including prime USDA, in a range of cuts all properly dry aged and at sensible money. The waiter, in a ritual rarely seen in London does a show and tell of the meat before hand which makes decision making even harder than it would be otherwise. Finally the meat is cooked to order in a charcoal oven.   

Unsuprisingly, I dodged the difficult choices by opting for the cheeseburger with Wyndham, now a BM regular, showing solidarity. The moment the order went in I felt a pang of regret - perhaps I should have gone for the New York Strip that Mrs BM went for? But in the event the Goodman burger was a revelation, with a sweet bun, good garnishes and excellent build. But above all the burger itself was a sensation - moist, deeply savoury and best of it was lifted by the smokeyness of the charcoal over which it was cooked. The burger stayed recognisably a sandwich throughout.

The chips, by contrast, I felt were dry, flavourless and not very pleasant with Wyndham making the same observation independently. This is a damn shame, though happily the other sides, such as the mash were much better.     

Goodman: a Russian owned, Chicago themed steakhouse in London with a great burger. Not what you would expect but who cares? This is a burger with real personality and class. And at twelve quid it is an excellent option that shines even in the company of some rather superior steaks.

Goodman, 26 Maddox Street, W1S 1QH Tel: 0207 499 3776

#11: Bodeans Review

Proper Bo I tell thee

Within half a square mile of Poland Street there are any number of burger joints - including the excellent Byron which many think has up-to-a-tenner bracket stitched up. But what Byron has in competent execution, Bodeans can easily match with real heart when it comes to meat and potatoes. 

Walking through the door is like doing a meaty barbecue bong, or chasing the hickory dragon. It is the sort of place that would make a vegan wretch. Their burger, which used to be known as the KC (Kansas City), might not be the most obvious choice on a menu full of quite delicious slow-cooked pulled pork, ribs and brisket sandwiches.

But, if I had a tenner and I wanted a burger I would go to Bodeans before Byron. I like the fact that this burger is everything it should be, a slice of Monterey Jack and served with a side of seasoned fries. The patty is meaty and cooked perfectly, the bun is a good ole sesame number and pickles are served on the side. Add a squirt of French's to the burger, drench the fries in barbecue sauce and Cholula and then finish with their Carolina sauce for good measure.

I love Bodeans. I love their burger. It brings a proper slice of Coors swilling, hockey playin', full fat, V8 hemi Americana to Soho. Two fat, sticky, barbecue sauce covered thumbs up.

Bodeans Soho, 10 Poland Street, London, W1F 8PZ Tel: 020 7287 7575